Two Second Solutions

Two Second Solutions

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  • Software’s Death by AI Is Greatly Exaggerated

    Software’s Death by AI Is Greatly Exaggerated

    August 27, 2025
    Stuff I Was Allowed to Post

    Another day, another round of “AI is here to kill everything you know and love.” Except, apparently, it’s not. According to The Wall Street Journal, enterprise software — the sprawling beast that runs HR, finance, compliance, and a thousand other cubicle nightmares — isn’t dying anytime soon. AI may be clever, but it’s not about…

  • Why Every Press Release Reads Like Mad Libs

    Why Every Press Release Reads Like Mad Libs

    August 26, 2025
    Burnout Diaries, Ken’s Corner of Concern

    By Ken Hollow, unwilling PR casualty and buzzword hostage Press releases are the cockroaches of corporate communication. Eternal, indestructible, and impossible to kill. Every company insists they need one, even though no one reads them except journalists who skim for quotes to mock and interns forced to format them in Word. But the real crime?…

  • Low-Hanging Fruit, My Ass

    Low-Hanging Fruit, My Ass

    August 25, 2025
    Burnout Diaries

    By Ken Hollow, unwilling gardener of corporate metaphors If one more brand manager tells me to “pick the low-hanging fruit,” I’m going to climb the corporate tree and throw the whole orchard at them. Business metaphors are the empty calories of corporate speak — they sound nourishing, but all they do is rot your brain…

  • Are We Entering AI Bubble Territory? Sam Altman Thinks So

    Are We Entering AI Bubble Territory? Sam Altman Thinks So

    August 24, 2025
    Stuff I Was Allowed to Post

    By Ken Hollow, reluctant tech correspondent with a migraine It finally happened: someone in Silicon Valley said the quiet part out loud. OpenAI CEO Sam Altman admitted that the current wave of AI hype might look suspiciously like the dot-com bubble in its final Red Bull-fueled days. Billions have been poured into AI companies promising…

  • Nana Wants a Corporate Retreat

    Nana Wants a Corporate Retreat

    August 23, 2025
    Don’t Try This at Home, Ken’s Corner of Concern

    By Ken Hollow, unwilling event planner and professional scapegoat Corporate retreats are already a nightmare. Trust falls, awkward icebreakers, and “vision alignment workshops” designed to make you cry in a hotel ballroom. But now? Add a fox spirit influencer with a flair for theatrics, and you get the kind of chaos that makes HR spontaneously…

  • Circling Back to Circle Back (On the Circling Back)

    Circling Back to Circle Back (On the Circling Back)

    August 22, 2025
    Burnout Diaries, Stuff I Was Allowed to Post

    By Ken Hollow, trapped in an infinite feedback loop of buzzwords If I die young, bury me in an Outlook calendar invite. Cause of death: “Just circling back.” My tombstone will read: “Per my last email.” Corporate jargon has many crimes, but none so insidious as the eternal loop of circling back, touching base, looping…

  • Why Every Meeting Could’ve Been an Email (and Every Email Is a War Crime)

    Why Every Meeting Could’ve Been an Email (and Every Email Is a War Crime)

    August 21, 2025
    Burnout Diaries

    By Ken Hollow, survivor of 4,000 Slack pings and counting I have seen the face of hell, and it is a recurring calendar invite labeled “Quick Sync.” There is no such thing as a quick sync. There is only the slow death of my soul as six people talk in circles for 45 minutes, then…

  • Why Every App Wants to Be a Bank Now

    Why Every App Wants to Be a Bank Now

    August 20, 2025
    Stuff I Was Allowed to Post

    By Ken Hollow, unwilling financier of the attention economy Here’s what I wanted from social media: to post a picture, scream into the void, maybe share a meme that will haunt me for five years. Here’s what I did not want: to be coerced into setting up a digital wallet every time I try to…

  • Nana Wants a Livestream (Pray for Me)

    Nana Wants a Livestream (Pray for Me)

    August 19, 2025
    Ken’s Corner of Concern

    By Ken Hollow, unwilling stream tech and chaos manager Here’s a sentence I never wanted to say: I am now the livestream producer for a fox spirit influencer who thinks buffering is a personal insult. Yes, Nana has decided that the world must see her live. Not pre-recorded. Not edited. Not safely tucked away behind…

  • Why Every App Wants to Be TikTok (and Fails Miserably)

    Why Every App Wants to Be TikTok (and Fails Miserably)

    August 18, 2025
    Stuff I Was Allowed to Post

    By Ken Hollow, unpaid trend chaser, reluctant doomscroller Let me tell you a secret: I don’t hate TikTok. I respect it. It’s the apex predator of apps. It knows what it is — fast, weird, addictive, chaotic. It has distilled human attention into 60-second vials of dopamine. That’s impressive, in a horrifying, “we’re all doomed”…

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Two Second Solutions

Two Second Solutions

Two Second Solutions is a creative narrative brand used for fictional and entertainment purposes.

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