Tag: #PleaseSendHelp
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By Ken Hollow, formerly a designer, now a priest of pixelated vibrations There was a time when I thought I knew what “branding” meant. Fonts. Colors. Maybe a logo if you’re feeling fancy. Then came Nana Vix.Then came the stickers.Then came the spiritual frequency alignment spreadsheet that lives rent-free in my nightmares. Let me explain.…
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By Ken Hollow, emotionally available and algorithmically punished It happens every time. I post something real. Vulnerable. Messy. The kind of caption where I admit I’m not thriving, I’m just hitting deadlines with a pulse and a prayer. And without fail: Let’s unpack why honesty is the fastest way to torpedo engagement. 🔹 Aesthetic >…
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By Ken Hollow, digitally exhausted and financially underwhelmed Let me preface this by saying I did everything “right.” I followed the gurus. I watched the webinars. I took notes in Notion like my life depended on it (because, in a way, it did). And then I did the thing every creator is told to do:…
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By Ken Hollow, spiritually disassociating via brand guidelines Every Monday starts the same. I open my laptop. I crack my knuckles. I take a deep breath. Then I get an email from Nana Vix’s assistant titled: “✨This Week’s Aura Forecast ✨” And I know — deep in my soul, or at least in my tired…
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By Ken Hollow, currently trapped inside his own brand voice It was supposed to be a joke. I had five minutes, an iced coffee, and a dangerously low tolerance for content calendars. I slapped together a quick reel — a satirical bit about client red flags using a trending sound, bad lighting, and a face…
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By Ken Hollow, unpaid astrologically and emotionally I was just about to schedule a launch. The posts were prepped. The hooks were tight. The carousel covers were giving “spiritual but monetizable.” And then, an email: “Hold everything. Mercury went retrograde.” It came from Nana Vix’s brand email — which is signed off with “Light, Love…
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By Ken Hollow, professionally stressed and personally short-circuiting It happened on a Tuesday — because of course it did. One second I was resizing a client’s Canva template, the next I was absolutely convinced I was dying. My chest tightened. My heart fluttered. My vision pulsed. I clutched my sternum like a Victorian widow and…
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By Ken Hollow, typing this with Slack notifications disabled and inner peace restored People like to romanticize freelancing. “Oh, the freedom!” “You make your own hours!” “You work in your pajamas!” All technically true. All mostly lies. Because the real reason I became a freelancer isn’t the freedom or the flexibility or the promise of…
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By Ken Hollow, part-time ghost in the algorithm machine Let me paint you a picture. You’ve crafted the perfect post. It’s clever. It’s formatted. You’ve picked the best carousel covers. It’s scheduled to drop at the peak time, on the statistically optimal day, during a cosmic alignment that allegedly boosts engagement. And then it goes…
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By Ken Hollow, proud owner of 14 unpaid invoices and a thriving aesthetic Welcome to another day in the glittering charade that is online success. Yes, I post. Yes, I get likes. Yes, brands send me things in boxes full of fake straw and lavender tissue paper. And yes, I’m in debt. Glorious, unrelenting, credit-limit-dancing…