Why My DMs Are Full of Bots (and Why I Prefer Them)

By Ken Hollow, barely tolerated human clinging to relevance in the age of automated companionship

It happened sometime around late 2024, though honestly I didn’t even notice until it was too late: my inbox — my sacred, chaotic, soul-draining DM inbox — stopped being human. Slowly, insidiously, the bots arrived. And not the fun “Hot singles in your area” kind. These were polished. Friendly. Curious. Optimized.

Now, here in 2025, at least half the DMs I get aren’t from clients, friends, or feral followers at all. They’re from AI-generated personas — brand assistants, automated outreach reps, virtual influencers, conversational marketing bots, and, disturbingly often, Nana Vix’s “enchanted fox spirit” chatbot alter ego.

And here’s the really worrying part: I actually prefer them.

🔹 The Signs Your DMs Have Been Taken Over

If you’re wondering whether your inbox has quietly transitioned into an uncanny valley community, look for these dead giveaways:

• The suspiciously cheerful “Hey Ken! Just checking in to see if you had a chance to explore our collaboration opportunity 💖✨” — from an account you’re sure you never followed.
• Perfect grammar. Always. Even at 3AM.
• Replies in under three seconds with flawless formatting and emoji cadence.
• Conversations that never go off-topic or spiral into existential dread like human conversations inevitably do.
• The occasional slip: “Thank you for your inquiry, [Name Placeholder]. We value your input.” Yep. Bot.

🔹 Why I Prefer Them Anyway

Let’s not pretend I’m not exhausted by real people. Human DMs are a minefield:

• Passive-aggressive “just circling back :)” messages.
• Cryptic one-word replies that leave me analyzing tone for hours.
• Clients who refuse to write full sentences or who fire off voice notes from an airport lounge while clearly juggling a smoothie and their own sense of entitlement.

Bots? They’re a dream by comparison:

✅ Polite, always.
✅ Clear objectives.
✅ No typos, no drama, no unexpected confessions at midnight.
✅ They thank me for my time — every time.

It’s honestly refreshing to have a conversation that’s 100% transactional and devoid of subtext. When a bot asks “Would you like to schedule a call this week?” they actually mean it. No weird vibes. No resentment. No hidden meaning.

🔹 The Brands Have Gone Full Bot

The corporate world wasted no time embracing this dystopia. By now every brand I interact with has at least one AI “ambassador”:

• The skincare line with the soothing chatbot that offers tips on pore care but also gently upsells me their latest quartz-infused serum.
• The supplement brand whose “community manager” signs every message “✨🌿 wishing you wellness 🌿✨” while auto-generating discount codes.
• Nana Vix’s own horrifying contribution: an enchanted chatbot that speaks in riddles and fox metaphors and, disturbingly, flirts with me while suggesting skincare bundles “aligned with my aura.”

Honestly, at least they’re consistent.

🔹 Influencer Outreach, Automated to Death

Once upon a time, brand outreach DMs were bad, but human:

“Hey! We love your vibe. Wanna collab? Free socks and 10% off for your followers? 💖”

Now they read like polished email templates delivered at scale:

“Hi Ken,
We’ve identified you as an ideal creator partner for our Q3 influencer activation campaign. Please review the attached briefing deck and confirm your availability by EOD tomorrow. 💼”

It’s cold, calculated… and honestly less annoying than endless follow-ups from stressed junior marketing staffers who forget what platform they’re even messaging me on.

The bots are winning. Because they’re efficient. And my human inbox companions? They’re out here sending “quick sync?” messages at 10PM on a Friday.

🔹 Are We All Just Bots Now?

Here’s the existential kicker: in trying to cope, creators like me have become semi-bots too.

• Auto-replies: On.
• Scheduled posts: Daily.
• AI-generated captions: Frequently.
• Automated analytics: Always.

At this point, my workflow is basically an endless game of “schedule, automate, optimize, repeat.” The humans in this system are just ghosts haunting their own social feeds. Even Nana barely texts me anymore — she just lets her foxbot DM me whenever Mercury retrograde demands a post about enchanted toner.

🔹 The Upside: Fewer Feelings, More Efficiency

I should be concerned. I should feel disturbed by the gradual replacement of messy, unpredictable human interaction with these perfectly crafted, emoji-balanced pseudo-conversations.

But honestly? I’m relieved.

There’s no emotional labor in replying “Thanks so much! I’ll take a look 🙏” to a bot. There’s no wondering if I’m being too formal or too casual. There’s no guessing about mood or tone or subtext.

Bots don’t ghost you. They don’t get offended. They don’t send confusing voice notes. They deliver exactly what you expect — and nothing more.

Which is honestly more than I can say for most clients.

🔹 Final Thoughts (Because I’m Contractually Obligated to Have Some)

The rise of AI-generated friends in my DMs isn’t just a weird blip — it’s the new normal. And frankly? I’m fine with it.

The bots are winning because they’re better at playing the game. They’re consistent. They don’t have bad days. They don’t procrastinate on approving Nana Vix’s fox spirit hair serum campaign because they’re “feeling off.”

So yeah: half my inbox isn’t human anymore.
And honestly? That’s probably for the best.

At least the bots don’t send me “quick sync?” at 10PM on a Friday.

Ken Hollow, possibly already replaced by an AI but too tired to care